You are not listening to me when…
You do not care about me
You say you understand before you know me well enough
You have an answer for my problem before I’ve finished telling you what my problem is
You cut me off before I’ve finished speaking
You find me boring and don’t tell me
You feel critical of my grammar, vocabulary or accent
You are dying to tell me something
You tell me about your experience making mine seem unimportant
You are communicating with someone else in the room
You refuse my thanks by saying you haven’t really done anything

You ARE listening to me when…
You come quietly into my world and allow me to be me
You really try to understand me even when I am not making much sense
You grasp my point of view even when it goes against your own sincere convictions
You realise the time I have taken from you has left you a bit tired and a bit drained
You allow me the dignity of making my own decisions, even though you think they may be wrong
You don’t take my problem from me, but allow me to deal with it in my own way
You hold back your desire to give me good advice when you sense I am not ready for it
You give me enough room to discover for myself what is going on
You accept my gift of gratitude by saying how good it makes you feel to know that you’ve been helpful.

Anon

Previous blogs related to Listening Poem:
27th February 2018, Autobiography In Five Short Chapters by Portia Nelson

Credits
Picture: johnhaine (2018) ‘Compassion.’ [Online] Available at: https://pixabay.com/en/compassion-listening-witnessing-857709/ (Accessed: 13 March 2018)

Bibliography 
Vision for learning (2018) Listening Poem. [Online] Available at: http://visionforlearning.co.uk/cfp/Listening%20Poem.pdf (Accessed: 13 March 2018)